Carlie the Homicidal Maniac
by Lady of Wind
Summary: Johnny has a daughter (my own character, and yes I know it's not an original plot), and she might just be more insane than her father. YIKES!


I've been doing mostly insane stuff lately, so I'm taking a break from it. I know, this story plot's been done before, but I couldn't help it. I really wanted to write this.  
  
Disclaimer: I own Carlie C. and Jaro, my muse. That's about it. Jhonen Vasquez owns everything else. BOW TO HIS SUPERIORITY!!!!!! MWAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA HAHHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!  
  
Jaro: *grumbles*  
  
  
  
"Oh God, this can't be," breathed Devi. She took another look at the home pregnancy test. It was positive, all right. She couldn't believe it. She was carrying that bastard Johnny's child.  
  
"This is NOT happening," she said, then suddenly fell to the floor as a wave of nausea overtook her. It was the infamous morning sickness.  
  
"Oh shit, this IS happening!" she exclaimed and burst into tears.  
  
"Devi, Devi, oh, I'm so sorry," said Tenna when she found out. "Are you going to have an abortion?"  
  
Devi glared at her best friend. "Hell no!" she said. "I can't take care of this baby, but by God, I'm giving birth to it!"  
  
Johnny laid on the floor, looking at the newest Happy Noodle Boy comic. Reverend Meat stared over his shoulder. "Hah, I see you're getting better each day," Meat sneered.  
  
Johnny was extremely annoyed by the, well, annoying little burger boy, but he was in no mood to argue with him. "Must you insist on tormenting me? Don't you have better things to do?" Meat just stared, the hideous grin seeming to grow wider. "No, but I think YOU do." Johnny bolted upright, and with two long strides was next to the Reverend. "What do you mean?" he asked suspiciously. "Your little love interest is bringing yet another unwanted thing into the world," Meat snickered. Johnny didn't catch on for second, then his eyes grew the size of plates. "NO WAY!!!!!" he cried, slightly swooning. "DEVI'S HAVING A BABY??!!" Meat chuckled. "Give the boy a prize," he laughed. Nny was out the door in a flash.  
  
"Push! Push! Come on, ma'am, you can do it! Push!" yelled the nurse in St. James' maternity ward. Devi grabbed her shirt and brought her face-to- face. "I AM PUSHING, GODDAMMIT!!! AHHHHHHHH!!! GIVE ME DRUGS!!!!" The doctor finally came in, and said, "One more push should do it!" Suddenly there was a high-pitched shriek of a baby, and the nurses and doctors sat down to rest. "Congratulations," said one nurse. "It's a girl." Devi could hardly believe her eyes. The baby was beautiful. She could feel tears spring to her eyes, not only from happiness, but from sadness as well. She signed the adoption papers, and cradled the baby girl. "I think I'll call her Carlie."  
  
Johnny had seen the entire thing. He too felt tears threaten. He wanted to hold her so badly, both of them. But he knew he couldn't. Not until Devi forgave him, which was unlikely. He turned and walked slowly down the ward, with a sadness he had never known before.  
  
So Carlie grew up. She never stayed long in one foster home, though. It seemed like nobody wanted her. Carlie didn't care. That was the way she liked it, being by herself. But, one day, it occurred to her that the reason people didn't want her was because of the things she did. Insane things, like lighting the stove on fire then "forgetting" to turn it off. Or seeing if the family dog could fly by throwing it off the roof. Things like that. It also occurred to her that people might think she was crazy, and it made her blood boil. Carlie didn't just dislike people; she HATED them, and was often abused by them. By the time she was 13, Carlie longed for another life, with her real parents, if they were still alive.  
  
Of course, Senor Diablo saw all of this. Whatever people might tell you, SD is not completely evil. He does have a heart. So he decided to create a little "accident". He put Malachi, the clumsiest demon, in charge of the space-time continuum machine. As he expected, Malachi totally disrupted it. What the demon didn't know was that SD had typed in Carlie's life. Senor Diablo smiled to himself. "Maybe now things will get a little bit more interesting up there on earth," he laughed.  
  
  
  
  
  
Aha! A cliffhanger! Please, people, read and review. I don't care if you like it, or if you want to flame it. I WANT REVIEWS!!! GIVE THEM TO MEEEEEE!!! PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSS SSSEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 


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